Marriage Myths-Part 1

If you know of the great story, “The Odyssey,” in which Ulysses struggles to find his way home following the Trojan War, you will remember how Ulysses and his crew were lured off course by promises of emotional or sensual delights that turned out to be myths and traps designed to prevent them from reaching their yearned-for home.

The Sirens almost succeeded in luring the king and crew to their death through their enchanted song; on the Island of the Lotus the men were drugged by lassitude and a false sense of peace; and in their encounter with the Harpies they were first trapped by seemingly never ending sensual delights that appealed to their human appetites.

There are many myths surrounding marriage that also send out false signals or make bogus offers that only serve to take us farther away from the true rewards of a healthy relationship. So much that the world tells us is counterfeit, it is sometimes hard to stay on track toward real joy and fulfillment.

In this LIFE Blog and in future newsletters in the coming weeks we will point to some of those myths that couples pursue at their peril, and give you some truth with which to replace them.

In this issue we will just list some of the dangerous myths, then in later issues and postings will describe them in some detail. Do any of these sound familiar to you?

Myth #1

If we have true love then we shouldn’t have to “work” at our marriage; it will simply be a natural and easy process.

Myth #2

Finances are the number one cause of divorce (you can replace the word ‘finances’ with any number of conflicts mentioned by divorce experts).

Myth #3

If our marriage does not have the same hormonal fireworks of our courtship and newlywed days, we are failing.

Myth #4

I just made a mistake when I thought I had found my Soul Mate, and I need to quit wasting time with this lump and get looking for the real thing.

Myth #5

We just sort of fell out of love

Myth #6

Pornography (individual or shared) will bring a bit of healthy spice to a marriage and is no threat to the partners or the relationship.

Myth #7

If we could just learn a few communication tools we could fix this thing.

Myth #8

If I keep trying I just know I can change my partner!

If you found yourself nodding at any of these absurdities then you deserve a healthy dose of truth and reality. We will provide that in coming postings and issues, but in the meantime consider getting the whole beautiful truth at a LIFE Marriage Retreat.