“So Let It Be Written; So Let It Be Done

Those of you of a certain age might remember the epic movie “The Ten Commandments” in which Yul Brynner plays the part of the Pharaoh of Egypt. The Pharaoh had a custom when setting a new policy or law to state with due gravity, “So let it be written; so let it be done.” This meant that negotiations and considerations were over and woe to anyone who did not obey the edict or deliver on their commitments. Writing our Marriage Commitments

For many years after that movie it was common to hear a teacher or meeting facilitator say, somewhat jokingly as an instruction was given or a decision reached, “So let it be written; so let it be done.” That was the signal for everyone to be on the same page and get to work on bringing the desired outcome to fruition.

During our Marriage Retreats our couples deal with the most important issues, challenges, and opportunities facing them and their families. They are thrilled as they build a solid base in their relationship then use the principles and skills they have learned to communicate effectively and find resolution to problems and set a new vision for their future.

After every successful discussion the couple is deeply relieved to have succeeded and somewhat giddy in their happiness. But we always gently bring them back to the task and ask them to:

1.    Clearly state the commitments they have made to one another.

2.     Repeat back what their partner has said so they both know they “get it.”

3.     Write the commitments down in their journal and read them to one another to make certain what is written is clearly understood by both partners.

In other words, the final step in a crucial conversation aimed at solving a problem or making a plan is represented in the Pharaoh’s ancient edict: “So Let It Be Written—So Let It Be Done.”

Try this as part of your problem solving processes and you will find that the follow-through of you and your partner delivering on your commitments on time and on task will increase; and you will find yourself with fewer of those relationship and life “weeds” that otherwise seem to just keep growing back time after time.

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