Entries by Gerry Dye

Love Languages and Christmas Gifts

Perhaps, like me, you have received some extra-special Christmas gifts: A favorite doll, the perfect bike, or the fashionable jeans you wore until they were ragged. When I was 9 and everything I held dear was about army and battle Mom and Dad gave me a toy machine gun mounted on a tripod that I […]

Common Threads: What Every Couple Wants (Part 1- Emotional Connection)

Couples who call LIFE Marriage Retreats looking for help for their struggling family relationships are all unique in the details of their marital and family obstacles, yet virtually all of them share some common yearnings for their desired ideal relationship: Emotional Connection Repair of eroded Trust Healing of Resentment and Hurt (with Forgiveness being a […]

Marriage Marauders: Negativity

While there are many potential joys in marriage there are always some marauding predators lurking about prepared to take a bite out of the happiness, trust, and security of our relationship. One of the most common is Negativity.  Our relationships tend to start with very positive views and opinions of one another, almost as if […]

Patience and Cowboy Boots

Did you hear about the Texas teacher who was helping one of her kindergarten students put on his cowboy boots? He asked for help and she could see why. Even with her pulling and him pushing, the little boots still didn’t want to go on. Finally, when the second boot was on, she had worked […]

Virtue and Vice

Some time ago Margo and I were working with Sarah and Jeremy at a LIFE Couples Retreat. Their perspectives of one another had, through their years of struggle, shrunk ever narrower until they saw only the negatives in their partner. To help them begin the process of broadening perspective we asked Sarah to name two […]

Who’s Not Hearing Whom?

The story is told of a wife growing more and more frustrated over her husband, Harvey’s, progressive hearing loss. She insisted he go to the doctor for tests and hearing aids but he claimed nothing was wrong and refused to go (you know how it can be with prideful men). She called the doctor and […]

Three Little Tools

I have been thinking a lot lately about three little tools.  In fact, they cross my mind nearly every time I help a couple to communicate better with one another.  They are to Mirror, Validate, and Empathize. The bottom line to understand about communication is that people want to be heard.  That is why we […]